The title says it all, I can hardly tolerate Perez Hilton any longer. Initially, it was easy to overlook the despicable parts of his bitchy personality and frumpy appearance because the commentary was at least different. Fast forward to the self-righteous interview that you’re about to read, his unabashed media whoring and you’ll understand why I’ve had enough of the portly little troll! I am here to declare that I am sick and tired of the “Gossip Gangster”. Jesus, you give a fat kid a break and see what happens! I could list other dozen reasons why Perez Hilton contributes to my physical and mental malaise but the primary ones are his self-righteousness and his erroneous belief that he is some sort of “gay knight” championing the cause of homosexuals around the country. Below are a few excerpts of a recent interview that he gave to Entertainment Weekly and The Advocate:

On why Perez is good for gay America:
“I think I am just by the sheer fact of my existence. I know that I personally would have loved to have me around when I was a gay teenager. Because when I was a gay teenager there weren’t that many openly gay celebrities. And I would have loved to have been like, ‘Wow look at that dude. He’s gay. He’s REALLY gay. And he’s successful and he’s not apologizing for that and he seems really happy.”

-Entertainment Weekly

Delusional?

Where do I begin? People, it’s not entirely his fault that Quasimodo thinks that he is celebrity, it’s partially yours. Perez, sweetie darling, you are nothing other than an over glorified blogger! What exactly have  you done that makes you someone worthy of emulation? I would like to imagine that you were taking the piss by making that statement but I doubt it. I say to anyone who considers Perez Hilton as a role model, please find an island and build a barge that is sturdy enough to hold all of your mentally handicapped kindred, take the talking manatee and leave.

To The Advocate, Perez had this to say:
“I thought about calling him the n-word, but I thought the f-word was even worse.”I was so filled with hate at that moment because I was hated on so much, and I reacted in the worst way possible. Then I went on to make a bunch of other mistakes. I shouldn’t have made the video. I shouldn’t have released so many statements. But what’s come out of all of this is that I’ve learned so much about myself, and I’m in a much better place. I’m actually thankful that it happened.

Let’s call a spade a spade

Is it just me or has his audacity just reached epic proportions? For someone who often goes on rants about racism, equality and believes that he is a source of inspiration to millions isn’t this hypocritical? Look at raucous you caused when Miss California gave you her candid yet discriminatory opinion during her pageant. But here you were, reverting to racial slurs because you felt attacked? Should all the accomplished musicians, like Fergie, who you attack on a daily basis react in the same manner?  A word of advice, those who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones. If you feel that you have the right to call Fergie “fugly”, then a candid self-examination of yourself is necessary. Therefore, please spare us the assault of your image on our eyes and call 1-800-LAP - BAND! If everyone that you had said something insulting about retaliated believe me you would not just be sporting a shiner.

Don’t like the taste of your own medicine?
I am going to be candid- I felt it was a pity that one punch was the only thing that you got. While I do not condone violence,  I  don’t understand why you are so surprised that you were attacked after making disparaging remarks about everyone! I mean you can’t be that  oblivious, can you? All it took was one aggressive attack and you started calling people names- it’s sad that at that juncture you thought the worst thing to call him was a faggot. I think you knew that had you dropped the n- word the repercussions would have been more severe. Are you also that full of self loathing that you thought  calling him gay was the best comeback?

And in regards to the  Funny or Die spoof, featuring Breckin Meyer and Zac Efron, of the post-will.i.am encounter video post:

“It was funny, but at the same time it was making fun of a violent attack. I wasn’t hurt but I was surprised because I’ve been nothing but glowing about Zac Efron. Maybe I was hurt a little, yeah.”

I didn’t know that the genetic cross between a gargoyle and a harpy could have feelings- you learn something new each day. Anyway, some words of wisdom “He’s just not that into you and he will never be”. Just because you’re fixated on Zac Efron doesn’t mean that he should reciprocate. Furthermore, what do you usually refer to Efron’s girlfriend as? I normally refrain from giving advice but in this case as long  as your writing continues to  cross my path, Perez, I believe that you could benefit from some professional loving help.  It’s plain to see that  despite your  accomplishments, you’re obviously still insecure and bitter. So, find a good therapist , stop being  a twat and  focus  on yourself for a change.

For anyone else who doesn’t agree with me about Perez, well I really don’t give a fuck what you think. It’s obvious that you’re not working with a full deck and I don’t suffer fools lightly.